Sunday, April 13, 2008
Lurve Patriarchy: Three score reasons to love being a man
Because I'm feeling trippy. Reposting from Brian's Multiply, just to see how many people (not just members of the opposite sex, mind you) react to these.
1. Phone conversations last 30 seconds
2. You know useful stuff about tanks and airplanes
3. A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase
4. Bathroom lines are 80% shorter
5. You can open all your own jars
6. Old friends don’t give you crap if you’ve lost or gained weight
7. Dry cleaners and haircutters don’t rob you blind
8. When clicking through the channels you don’t have to stop on every shot of someone crying
9. You don’t have to lug a bag of “necessary” items with you everywhere you go
10. You can go to the bathroom without a support group
11. Your last name stays put
12. You can leave a motel room bed unmade
13. You can kill your own food
14. The garage is all yours
15. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness
16. You see the humor in “Terms of Endearment”
17. You never have to clean the toilet
18. You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes
19. Wedding plans take care of themselves
20. If someone forgets to invite you to something, they can still be your friend.
21. Your underwear cost $7.50 for a pack of 3
22. None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry
23. You don’t have to shave below your neck
24. You don’t have to curl up next to some big, hairy guy every night
25. If you are 34 and single, no one notices
26. Chocolate is just another snack
27. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat
28. Flowers fix everything
29. You never have to worry about other’s feelings
30. Three pair of shoes are more than enough
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