Monday, October 23, 2006

Diary of a Zombie Insomniac, Part V

ON ZOMBIFICATION

Then: The black magic of voodoo sorcerers allegedly consists of various poisons (perhaps that of the puffer fish) which immobilize a person for days, as well as hallucinogens administered upon revival. The result is a brain damaged creature used by the sorcerers as slaves, viz., the zombies. (Taken from skepdic.com)

Now: In lieu of pufferfish lips (which pose a threat to the zombie-to-be, in addition to being more scarce than before), sorcerers depend on two less potent yet still efficient poisons, namely sugar and caffeine. These can be taken in any order as long as they are in excessive quantities, which are greatly dependent on the zombie-to-be's resistance to these substances.

Tonight, I am a zombie again.

Had coffee a few hours after dinner, because I knew I had to stay zombified long enough to finish this Goddamn Coma paper. Caffeine is usually one of my weaknesses, but tonight's can (I like my caffeine iced at night, warm coffee a) burns my tongue, the raw and stinging sensation making the zombification more difficult, and b) makes me sleepy, risking the chance of ruining the entire process) just didnt make the cut; I was still human.

So if caffeine doesn't work, try the next poison: sugar. Or better yet, try a combination of both, which is what I did, passing by the store to pick up some Coke, a pack of chips and those little coffee-flavored candies on the way home, which I then proceeded to devour the way starved jackals feast on a rotting zebra.

And yes, they did the trick. I'm back to the semi-conscious state I stalk the twilight with. I'm back in the world of the night, one with the insomniacs, lunatics and my fellow zombies. I am a zombie again.

Now to finish this paper...

posted by Ocnarf @ 4:43 AM   1 have spoken

The Keeper

Franco Regalado

"Scriptito ergo sum."

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